By Cecelia Campbell Livingston
On August 22, Pastor Brenard McDonald, pastor of Grace Baptist Church in May Pen, Clarendon, celebrated 31 years of marriage to his wife Beverley. He shared how he fell in love with her the moment he first saw her, and how their romance has grown stronger with time.
A young deacon at his church, he still remembers that encounter as he reminisced with Freedom Come Rain about how the minute she stepped in church. He was lost!
“I saw this person come in, and she was late. She was a tall, elegant, beautiful girl, and I immediately spotted her, and my eyes followed her until she got a seat,” he said.
Pastor McDonald claimed that a remark his mother made to him after church surprised him. She described his wife, asking him if he had noticed her!
“I said mama, you saw her to!” he recalled with a laugh.
He had another opportunity to meet her when the youth fellowship department hosted a street meeting. She was there, and coincidentally, his female cousin was a friend of her cousin, so he used the opportunity to go over and start witnessing to her. In his own words, he found a way to make the most of the situation.
He issued an invitation for her to attend a youth fellowship, an offer she took up. Soon, she was a regular visitor until she eventually gave her life to the Lord and was baptised.
“I used the opportunity to do follow-up visits, but in following up, I was following my interests. I met her family; the family was very welcoming; the mother was a member of our church, so that made it easier,” he shared.
Pastor McDonald said her family didn’t have to worry as he was “a proper” gentleman and knew how to behave himself. They dated for four years before he popped the question.
He said he delayed because he wanted to be sure that she was indeed the one for him, even if his heart was telling him otherwise. He said when Beverley came to the church, there were two other females there who had their eyes on him. He asked the Lord to give him a sign so he would know exactly who was the right person for him.
“Would you believe the other two females I was looking at migrated? So I knew she was the one,” he highlighted.
Thirty-one years later, Pastor McDonald shares that they have learned to manoeuvre every challenge in their relationship, with the major one being not having a child in the union.
Following an ectopic pregnancy, the doctors assured them that there was nothing preventing his wife from getting pregnant again.
They struggled over the years, but remained childless. He said they both looked forward to being parents, and as for him, he always wanted to be a ‘girl dad’. With his wife coming from a large family and he from a ‘medium-sized one, and their siblings having children, he thought they too would.
“We did everything that we needed to do, and I realised that after a period of time, God has a way of maturing you to accept what is in His will and to understand that it is not for you. I do believe that God has called us to pastor children who are bereft of paternal love and care. We have a lot of godchildren; we have nephews and nieces that just loves us. This is where we have seen our ministry,” he stated.
Describing himself as an introvert, he said there are times he has to be careful to ensure he gives his wife the prime time she deserves.
“I love her because I saw something different in her, but at the same time I learn to be patient with her because she has her objectives and her idiosyncrasies, and I learn that I cannot operate on my agenda; I would want to go somewhere and she does not, and she would want to and I don’t. She is outgoing sometimes, and when I turn down her invitations, I see that there are sullen moments, but I quickly learn how to say I am sorry,” he shared about his efforts to be “more outgoing”.
Still, he says there are little things he does to make sure he keeps her happy, which include purchasing something that catches his eye that he thinks she would really appreciate and taking it home for her.
“That would create an opportunity for her to show more love,” he stressed as he pointed out that other couples can follow that pattern and be impulsive too.
Being the head of the house, he said he ensures that as a couple, they have time for prayer, and even if they enjoy a movie night, it must not be secular.
“I want her to understand that I take my Christianity seriously,” he intones.
Anything in store for her? With a smile, McDonald said there is one surprise he is working on, and no, he cannot share it with the team. All he was willing to reveal was that when it happens, she will be over the moon!
