Social worker, Joyce Barnaby is appealing to parents to put structures in place at home to assist in raising more disciplined children.
She made the appeal during a special parenting empowerment session last Sunday, hosted by the Tarrant Baptist Church and Freedom Come Ministries International at the Freedom Come big tent in Gordon Pen, Spanish Town. She noted that without structures, there will be chaos in the home.
“Children need to have bedtime; it is not about when their eyes are tired with the tablet, they have to know when they have to get up to get ready for school, because if they don’t get out of bed on time, they’re going to be late for school, and you’re going to be late for work, and all of this. So if these things are not put in place, it is chaos in the home,” cautioned Barnaby, who works with the National Parenting Commission.
She also highlighted that parents should set boundaries. Although they should keep the communication lines open and encourage children to talk about anything, they must know that they are still adults and deserve the respect this carries.
The social worker also encouraged parents to be involved in their children’s school lives. Among the suggestions made was for them to volunteer at the school, be a part of the projects, and ask teachers and administrators how they can assist in whatever programme the school is carrying out.
“Let your child’s teacher know I can come in as a resource person and be a part of the school projects—participation for purpose,” she quipped.
Among the other invaluable gems given by Barnaby to parents, is that they should engage children in the work process at home. They can let them assist with cooking, give them simple things to do, and praise them for carrying out assigned tasks. Even if it is not done perfectly, encouraging words should be given.
An important observation Barnaby made, was that parents are asking children to excel in school, making good grades in the Primary Exit Profile, and when the child does just that, coming home excited about the achievement of being placed at a top school, some parents put a damper on it.
“What are you doing to empower your children? They pass for a particular school, and you say, you don’t have the money and are seeking a transfer. While you were telling the child to do well, you should have been doing some things, pardner, saving, so that when the time comes, you won’t have to ask anyone for anything. Start making preparations; put things in place from early,” she encouraged.
Following the presentation, there was an interactive discussion with the audience and panelists. The panel included, Olive Bartley Johnson, Annalee Granville, Dr. Warren Thompson, and Mr. Donovan Gayle.
Responding to the question on the ‘greatest concern right now regarding parents and the role they should play, Dr. Thompson from the Child Protection and Family Services Agency (CPFSA) said the main issues he is seeing surround behavioural problems. He said this can be corrected by parents playing a more important role in disciplining their children.
“I am not talking about abusing children or using physical violence. I’m talking about disciplining children. Parents have a very important role in training children and raising them in the way they should go,” he stressed, adding that many parents have abdicated their responsibilities, leaving their children to be reared by television and gadgets, which is of great concern to him.
Soldier Donovan Gayle, responding to a parent who asked about structure, said it is important for parents to ensure that from the minute their child arrives home from school, they have a system in place.
“When they come from school, it is there in their face structure. They take a shower as they relax, and after that, they break with homework or school work, and then you have one hour or so to chime in on what you want to do under that supervision. If you do not have structure in the home, the kids will have no purpose or know what they ought to do, so they will do anything that they feel like they should without structure or supervision,” he noted.