It is common knowledge that the family is the pillar of society, the foundation on which all other institutions stand. If families do not exist in the way that God has ordained it, then that disrepair will be reflected in other sectors of society, leading to a state of chaos. One way in which society may find itself in this unfortunate position, according to one Pastor, is when men do not operate in their God-ordained roles.
Pastor Nigel Holness, as a remedy to this grave situation, is encouraging single mothers to seek father figures in the church for their children. He made the appeal while addressing the attendees of the recent Tarrant-Balmagie Circuit of Churches Women’s Conference 2026.
“If there is no husband or father overlooking your children, I encourage you to look out for a man in your church that he can provide some mentorship, some encouragement, some guidance, some wisdom imparted to your sons,” he urged, “Our churches need to have mentorship programmes for the boys who have no father or father figures in their lives. Otherwise we’re going to have a totally destructive society because our men are weak and out of place, out of position, can’t do what God called them to do.”
This is a step, according to Pastor Holness, in ensuring children, particularly sons, leadership skills are not eroded, leading to passiveness. This passiveness, if not prevented, would in turn, force women to step out of their ordained roles and into the role of the men.
“Let me tell you, we have gotten it so wrong. The male-man is supposed to be the leader,” he emphasized, “When Eve said to Adam ‘Yow take a bite of this apple’ Adam’s response should have been ‘No I was given the word from Almighty God. We ain’t going to go down there.’ But what did he do? Then the audacity of Adam to say to God, ‘God a the woman you give me.’ A dat a happen in our society. Men are blaming the women for the crisis. So the women now take it up on themselves and the culture of women now is this woman movement. I must be independent. I am not dependent on a man to lead my household anymore.”
He also referenced the book of Isaiah, pointing out that the mentality of men such as these is one contributor to the fueling of unfair stereotypes, eventually affecting offspring.
“Right now we have a crisis with men in this country. (The book of) Isaiah clearly states that when men are out of place, you know what happens? Children become disobedient. Women become leaders. Read the Word, and men become weak. It’s in the Word. We have weak leadership.’ he said, “That’s why the women are taking control of the house. Man nuh wah go work again. Man nuh waah open the door fi them wife. Man nuh waah go chop grass anymore.”
Pastor Holness also sought to clarify that despite the rise of the women’s empowerment movement, which is a global push for the recognition of men and women as equals in all spheres, the Word of God dictates the truth, which outlines all human beings as equal. But in terms of role, husbands are the heads of their home and children are under the covering of that marriage unit.
The findings of a 2022 UK-based study reveal that father absence during early childhood is associated with greater levels of depression in early adulthood. In addition, it disclosed that early childhood father absence is associated with more severe depression trajectories across adolescence and early adulthood.
Another study from Diponegoro University, in Indonesia focusing on the effects of fatherlessness on women, revealed that respondents expressed issues in trusting and maintaining open communication with close friends. They expressed that disappointment in their father figure led them to choose a partner to fulfill their psychological needs related to the missing fatherly figure.
